97.1 The Brook

Your very own station! Brought to you by the students in the AV department, live, twenty four seven! Send in your requests and stay tuned for some of those supernatural tunes that only Sunnybrook can appreciate!

Broadcasts

Word on the Street 11/13

- Hide

[Gentle upbeat morning radio background music plays]
KAZ: For those of you just tuning in, it's just gone 9:30 and you're listening to 97.1 The Brook
[Sound bite of a male voice saying “The Brook” in progressively deeper tones]
KAZ: This is Kaz and The Goggles with your breakfast broadcast
THE GOGGLES: Bringing /you/ all the tunes
KAZ: All the news
THE GOGGLES: And all the gossip!
[Sound bite of a female voice going “Ooh”]
KAZ: Now, we know what's on everyone's mind right now:
THE GOGGLES: The school is still in lockdown.
[Sound bite of a crowd going “Booooo”]
KAZ: All is not lost, though, listeners, because this evening on the Love Corner, The Brook's own Kelsey Hook will be giving you her top five on-campus date ideas, so stay tuned.
THE GOGGLES: Spoilers: Not the cafeteria.
[Wilhelm scream]
[Kaz and THE GOGGLES chuckling]
THE GOGGLES: Speaking of romance, Kaz, is it time for Word on the Street?
KAZ: Let me check the ti- Yes, Kaz, yes it is, here's Word on the Street
['Bling' sound effect, papers shuffling]
KAZ: That's right listeners, it's time for us to take an unhealthy interest in the love lives of our fellow students. What's first on the docket, Stone?
THE GOGGLES: Well it's- I know he's your favourite listener, Kaz, Austin Silver
[Clap sound]
KAZ: Yes! Austin, so glad to have you back, nobody requests 80s jams as frequently as you, man.
THE GOGGLES: Well, Word on the Street is that Austin Silver is back in the dating game.
KAZ: Ooh, and this is the Austin Silver who prior to his mysterious absence
[One-second chunk of X-Files theme]
KAZ: Was famous for
THE GOGGLES: Famous?
KAZ: Well known for turning down, let's be frank, some of the hottest babes in the brook with claims of being committed to an unknown outside party.
THE GOGGLES: This is that same Austin Silver, yes, but we have it on good authority-
KAZ: The Brook will not reveal its sources.
THE GOGGLES: We have it on good authority that he has vowed - /vowed/ - to woo none other than recent arrival Tara Strong. This Herculean task set down for him is composed of, and here I quote, “three amazing dates.”
KAZ: Well let's hope he's listening to Kelsey on the Love Corner later because /I/ wouldn't know how to wring three dates out of this campus.
[The Goggles laughing]
THE GOGGLES: You couldn't manage one
[Sound bite of a crowd going “ooooh!”]
KAZ: Don't look now listeners
THE GOGGLES: Why's that?
KAZ: It's a couple.
[Airhorn sounds]
KAZ: You will not guess who is in a monogamous relationship.
THE GOGGLES: You won't believe us when we tell you
KAZ: Tell them.
THE GOGGLES: None other than Cass “Sunnybrook Sex Joke Record Holder”-
KAZ: A crown former of Austin Silver's lofty brow.
THE GOGGLES: Cass “Nontraditional” Walker-Handal
KAZ: And which fraction of the student body has the honor?
THE GOGGLES: That would be Callum Ellis, the strongman late of Kansas
KAZ: We've talked about Callum before
THE GOGGLES: We have, in last week's “Students that remind us of superheroes” countdown, Callum stole the show
KAZ: He's from a FARM in KANSAS
THE GOGGLES: It's true. As always here at The Brook, Kaz and The Goggles are delighted to announce a new couple over our humble airwaves
KAZ: We salute you, Cass and Callum.
[Sound of exactly one party-popper]
KAZ: In honour of our resident Superboy, here's 3 Doors Down with “Kryptonite”
[Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down plays]

Word on the Street 11/15

- Hide

KAZ: Oh my god
THE GOGGLES: What?
KAZ: Oh my god
THE GOGGLES: What is it Kaz?
KAZ: It's time for Word on the Street
[several sound effects played over each other]
KAZ: We're sorry.
THE GOGGLES: He's not
KAZ: It's true
[sound bite of someone saying “deal with it”]
KAZ: Who are we stalking today, my begoggled compadre?
THE GOGGLES: Well first order of business, Callum Ellis
KAZ: He's the big one, listeners.
THE GOGGLES: Yeah, he's been seen with Yuki, doing baseball things
KAZ: Scandal!
THE GOGGLES: The opposite! They're apparently still friends after the Gazebo Debacle.
KAZ: The Brook continues to refuse to reveal its sources.
THE GOGGLES: I'm glad they're friends, personally
KAZ: Yeah, I think it's sweet
[Sound bite of crowd going “awww”]
KAZ: However that leads us in to one of our favourite points of discussion.
THE GOGGLES: Yukihime Fujishima
KAZ: That's right, listeners, it's YukiWatch 2018
[News show opening sound effect]
KAZ: Once again on Word on the Street, we're discussing Sunnybrook's most eligible bachelorette
THE GOGGLES: This coming in the wake of Cass and Calum failing to get the girl on side
KAZ: We can tell you, listeners, that Yuki prematurely left a picnic date with local lycanthrope Moby White
[Wolf howl sound effect]
KAZ: Taking a single dish – we cannot confirm what – with her as she left.
THE GOGGLES: Speculation points to noodles.
KAZ: We can neither confirm nor deny noodles at this point.
THE GOGGLES: It is pure speculation.
KAZ: Regardless, this is a huge upset
THE GOGGLES: Huge
KAZ: According to polls conducted by your guys here at 97.1 The Brook
[Sound bite of a male voice saying “The Brook” in progressively deeper tones]
KAZ: Moby's approval rating is /through the floor/
THE GOGGLES: Literally the last person you'd expect to see with the Belle of the Brook, Miss Fuhishima
KAZ: Keep it in your pants, G.
THE GOGGLES: Only if you can when I tell you who /else/ Yuki's been eating outdoors with.
KAZ: Is it?
THE GOGGLES: It is.
KAZ: Austin, my boy!
[Airhorn sounds]
KAZ: Nice one!
THE GOGGLES: [Gently, leaning in to mic] 97.1 The Brook is an impartial and nonpartisan source of news and student gossip. Opinions put forth by Kaz and The Goggles are not necessarily those of 97.1 The Brook.
KAZ: It's anyone's game- not to be too, uh, what's the word?
THE GOGGLES: Chauvinist.
KAZ: Yes.
[Sound bite of a crowd booing]
KAZ: Anyway
THE GOGGLES: Have we got a song for the listeners?
KAZ: We do. In honour of the underdog in the race, here's Warren Zevon with “Werewolves of London.”
THE GOGGLES: Stay tuned because after the song Kaz and I will be back discussing just which students have been spending suspicious amounts of time in the cafetera.
KAZ: Don't touch that dial.
[“Werewolves of London” by Warren Zevon]

Word on the Street 12/7

- Hide

[Ninja Sex Part cover of “Everybody Wants To Rule The World” fading out]
KAZ: For those of you still confused, this is 97.1 The V-
THE GOGGLES: The Pentagram!
KAZ: We're calling it The V!
THE GOGGLES: Pentagram sounds cooler.
KAZ: You're listening to 97.1 The V
[Sound bite of a male voice saying “The Brook” in progressively deeper tones]
THE GOGGLES: Have not changed that yet.
KAZ: Kaz and the Goggles are finally back on your airwaves bringing you
KAZ: [simultaneous] The Word on the Street
THE GOGGLES: [simultaneous] The Word on the Street
KAZ: You'll have to indulge us, dear listener, because we're still catching up on old news
[Sound bite of a crowd booing]
KAZ: We're playing catch-up
THE GOGGLES: It was a long walk
KAZ: We walked from Pennsylvania to Canada, nobody told me that was part of the deal
THE GOGGLES: What deal?
[Sound effect of prison bars slamming shut]
[Kaz and the Goggles both laughing]
KAZ: Anyway
THE GOGGLES: Anyway, we have news for you, even if it's old news, it stays news until we say it.
KAZ: And then a little while after
THE GOGGLES: So back at the Brook
[Sound bite of a male voice saying “The Brook” in progressively deeper tones]
THE GOGGLES: Thank you, Kaz – Kat, gods bless her soul, was painting the gazebo
KAZ: The historic gazebo, which, through the magic of magic, is still with us, thank heaven
[Sound bite of Kaz's voice saying “all praise the Gazeeebooo” backed by a choir]
THE GOGGLES: Painting our good lord Gazebo, who should show up but Athene
KAZ: The goddess of wisdom her own self
THE GOGGLES: The student, Athene. They talk
KAZ: Almost.
THE GOGGLES: Athene gets mad
KAZ: She is not someone you want to get mad
THE GOGGLES: Athene tries to leave
KAZ: It takes a while.
THE GOGGLES: Kat throws paint at her
KAZ: We have eyewitness accounts.
THE GOGGLES: Then Akemi shows up
KAZ: Be still, my heart.
THE GOGGLES: Somehow Athene's phone ends up getting broken, and everyone quits the scene.
KAZ: How's that for you, student body?
THE GOGGLES: Truly a tableau for the ages, I hope they're all okay.
KAZ: You are not nearly vicious enough to be a rumour-monger, TG.
THE GOGGLES: Clearly, especially when it comes to our next item.
[Sound of Kaz clambering onto his chair and grabbing the mic up to his face]
KAZ: CALLUM, WHY YOU PLAYIN' AROUND DOG?
THE GOGGLES: Speaking of old news, here's a thing you've all heard about already.
KAZ: I BELIEVED IN YOU, MAN
[Sound of Kaz clambering back into his seat and re-adjusting the mic]
THE GOGGLES: Kaz and I have differing opinions on this.
KAZ: Chyeah.
[Sound bite of a crowd booing]
THE GOGGLES: I think it's all a frame-job.
KAZ: There are pictures!
THE GOGGLES: For those not in the loop, there are allegations and supposed photographic evidence that Callum Ellis has been cheating on Cass Walker-Handal with
KAZ: An actual harem!
THE GOGGLES: More than one girl.
KAZ: Leave some ladies for the rest of us, Gigantor!
THE GOGGLES: Like you had a chance with any of them
[Sound bite of crowd going “oooooh”]
KAZ: Yuki, babe! You deserve better! Let a real man show you a good time.
THE GOGGLES: You're like five, Kaz.
KAZ: Goggles, how does it feel to be the only person on campus defending Callum Ellis?
THE GOGGLES: Innocent until proven guilty, Kaz.
KAZ: ACTUAL PICTURES
THE GOGGLES: We have shapeshifters!
KAZ: [Mugging to the mic] Tune in this evening for our list of Top 5 Students Who Could Ruin Your Reputation By Being You.
THE GOGGLES: The top spot may surprise you.
KAZ: Anyway, I'm sure I'm not the only one who wants to give Callum a piece of my mind.
THE GOGGLES: You would squeak in fear and run away if he even looked at you.
KAZ: He's very strong.
THE GOGGLES: And you're a pussy
KAZ: But that doesn't mean he shouldn't think before he cheats.
[“Before He Cheats” by Carrie Underwood begins fading in]
THE GOGGLES: Oh my god please stop trying to introduce songs like that…